Thursday, August 20, 2009

Poor Dear Abby!

Dear Abby was speechless when these came in:

Dear Abby:
A couple of women moved in across the hall from me. One is a middle-aged gym teacher and the other is a social worker in her mid-twenties. These two women go everywhere together and I've never seen a man go into their apartment or come out. Do you think they could be Lebanese?


Dear Abby:
What can I do about all the sex, nudity, language and violence on my VCR?


Dear Abby:
I have a man I never could trust. He cheats so much I'm not even sure this baby I'm carrying is his.


Dear Abby:
I am a twenty-three-year-old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two years. It's getting expensive and I think my boyfriend should share half the cost, but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him.


Dear Abby:
I suspected that my husband had been fooling around, and when I confronted him with the evidence he denied everything and said it would never happen again.


Dear Abby:
Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was raised in a good Christian home turn against his own?


Dear Abby:
I joined the Navy to see the world. I've seen it. Now, how do I get out?


Dear Abby:
My forty-year-old son has been paying a psychiatrist $50 an hour every week for two-and-a-half years. He must be crazy.


Dear Abby:
I was married to Bill for three months and I didn't know he drank until one night he came home sober.


Dear Abby:
My mother is mean and short-tempered. I think she is going through her mental pause.


Dear Abby:
You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband lost all interest in sex years ago and he is a doctor.

2 Comments:

The Kid In The Front Row said...

haha, this is brilliant.. very, very, very funny!!

Blog Queen said...

These are absolutely priceless...ROFL